THE LIGHTSABER MAKER

A long time ago...was the last time I posted something 
on Halfsquatch. To be honest, there just hasn't been 
anything blogworthy for the last 8 years or so. Until now!  
A guy I bump into now and then named Jeremy Brown 
made his own Star Wars movie for George Lucas. I haven't 
seen it yet and not sure when I will, but I saw a trailer a 
while back.  I stopped him on the street this week and 
asked him a few questions.

HALFSQUATCH: Hey J. Brown. Hope the force is with you. I presume by the massive Millennium Falcom tattoo on your chest that you’re a big Star Wars fan; what is your first memory of Star Wars and how did it shape you into being the guy you are today? JEREMY BROWN: Dad says I was consummated at a Star  Wars. That's the thing with a priest right? HS:What was that initial thing that got you hooked on Star Wars and is that one magical thing still there or have you moved on? JB: Every [indiscernible] is dirty and it makes me feel less guilty  about my dirt. HS: What's your favourite colour? JB: Dirt.  HS: In a nutshell, what's the short about and what was the inspiration to create it? JB: It's called the Lightsaber Maker. It's about a Lightsaber Maker.  HS: Cool. If you could be an animal what would it be and why? JB: An alpaca because they are nature's hardiest animal. HS: I haven’t seen the short but I presume it has a ton of robots and spaceships and lasers in it? Any CGA Yabba Jabba Binks full-on CGI character stuff? JB: When I get funding for the special edition I'll add so many  CG's HS: Who did all of your motion-capture work?! JB: I stuck reflectors all over a raccoon and locked it in the  bathroom with a strobe light.   A REAL LIFE MOTION CAPTIVE ACTOR! HS: You work quite a bit in computer graphic animations and yet from what I’ve seen, it seems like there’s a lot of practical effects. When I heard you were making a short Star Wars fan film, I thought it would be all CGA and I pictured my favourite CGA show (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mhUH1giMtaY)   and thought it would look like that but it doesn’t because you filmed it using real people in real locations (sometimes referred to as “Live Action”). How was that experience? JB: Harder because the actor "Scott" wouldn't let me touch him  to move his face and body frame by frame, so I had to improvise.  HS: When you were a baby, you played the role of “Labyrinth Baby” in the cult classic Labyrinth. Did any of that amazing experience rub off in any way when making this short film? JB: David Bowie is my real dad which is how I won the part HS:I can imagine that one of the highlights of writing a Star Wars script would be getting to name the robots. Names like R2D2 (artoo-deetoo) and C3PO (See Three Pio) and BB8 (Bee-Bee Ate) just roll off the tongue like a hot knife in butter and is the stuff of legend. What was the name of your robot in this film and is there anything behind his/her/its name? Walk me around this guy. Kick his tires for me. Let’s look under the hood and let’s get to the nitty gritty. What’s it made of. What’s its dealio? JB: His name is ARB-81 and he's named after my parents (his  GRAND PARENTS) Anne and Rod Brown. And I was born in 1981.  I call him Arbee.  He's basically 3 garbage mashedtogether and  put on wheels. He's the closest friend I've ever had. Like a son.  That I'm also best friends with.  A robot HS:If I could name a Star Wars robot I’d go with 4Z99 (Four Zed Nine Nine). You’re a creative guy, what do you think its special powers could be and if you make a sequel, you could put 4Z (short for 4Z99) in it!!! JB: I'd like a droid that gets me ready in the morning so I don't have  to do anything. Also it would go to work for me. Arbee does none  of that because he is a disappointment. The Director of The Lightsaber Maniac (right) with robot ARBEE (left). HS :What’s your favourite food? JB: Fisherman's friend cough drops.  HS: If you were to become an alpaca, do you think you’d still seek out an alpaca's usual favourite food? I wonder if animal taste buds are different than humans because if I were to become a squirrel, I don’t think I’d like the flavour of a gross mouse and would rather eat pizza or better yet tacos. JB: I don't understand. There are no squirrels in the movie.  HS: What was the biggest challenge of filming The Lightsaber Maniac? JB: Making the robot. I don't know how to make robots. HS: Let’s talk shop. Favourite part of making The Lightsaber Maniac? JB: Making the robot because we are so close now.   HS: Most surprising thing to come out of filming your short?   JB: So far it's gotten me nowhere and is looking like a big fat  waste of money and internet.  HS: I too think losing money sucks. From some of the behind the scenes photos, it appears that everyone’s bundled up, yet it doesn’t look like Hoth. Explain yourself. JB: We shot in December and it was so cold in there I couldn't  use some takes because you could see the actors breath.  Everyone was miserable I felt like James Cameron it was  intoxicating! HS: Let’s stop for a moment and talk about craft service. Your crew, chilled to the bone and near death, must have needed something warm to keep them limber. What did you serve them? JB: I keep them alive with granola bars and when those ran out,  we turned on each other. I am the only survivor.  HS: You had a pre-screening in town and I wasn’t there because of my problems. How’d the night unfold?! How did people react! Walk me through the night. JB: It was good. The film was well received and until Arbee got  wasted  and started saying really embarrassing things about my looks and  body, I was having fun. But that robot ruined my night. He really is  my son.  HS: Did you get John Williams to compose the music? JB: No my friend Shawn did and he did so good.  HS: Going back to the thing you said earlier about tacos, describe to me, in detail, the perfect taco. JB: I don't even know how to pronounce "taco" HS: Mmmm. All this taco talk is making me crave tacos for some reason. Anything you’d like to add before we sneak into the VCC cooking classroom and make ourselves some “thief tacos?” JB: No I have to go.  HS: Okay Jay. Good luck filming stuff! Hope is the force with you. Another typical actor in a motion captive suit.