Sunday, May 18, 2008


Hmmmm. There's something about Frank Miller comics and cgi that go hand-in-hand. First there was Sin City which had a great look but it was directed by Robert Rodriguez so I couldn't bother wasting 2 hours of my life. Then there was 300. Again, great look, but this time it was Zach Snyder so I decided that I could afford 3 hours of my life, which unfortunately I will never get back. The movie stunk to high-heaven. Now comes The Spirit. If you haven't seen the teaser trailer, I warn you, this review of the teaser trailer has MAJOR spoilers.

Here's the deal. Like Sin City, this movie has a real high-contrast, B&W (black and white) CGI background thingy going for it. The human in this trailer is a guy who really loves cats. He probably has hundreds of them. He also has a really fucked-up tie. It's all constant-red that flutters about as if it has a mind of its own! If I were this guy, I'd think twice about putting this thing on if he's going to battle crime because if he were to be hiding in shadows, his stupid tie would definitely give him away.

After receiving a mysterious phone call, Mr. Spirit dashes about the city, high upon the roof-tops, jumping from building to building using what may be the worst case of wire-work in motion cinema (even worse than Crouching Tiger!). I mean the guy's practically floating above the roof tops like a Vegas Cirque De Soleil act. Did they only rent the wire-work rig and crew for an hour?

Frank: "Okay boys, that's a wrap! Nice job everyone!"
Actor with fucked up tie: "Uh, hey, Frank, I almost bailed on that one take and think that if I could do it just one more time, I wouldn't look so sloppy. Let me have another go, and I'll make it look better for ya."
Frank: "Naaah, it'll be fine."
Wire-rigger: If we loosen the slack just a bit, it'll give him a bit more realistic gravity. He's kinda leapin' like a fuckin' fairy. I'd like to have another go at it."
Frank: "Naaah, it'll be fine. Once we remove the green screen and comp a city behind him, it'll look fantastic. Besides, everyone'll be looking at the tie!"

Finally, to finish the trailer off, there's our main hero standing on some words in a static pose and then two crazy cuts of random jumping at camera that don't work whatsoever. Pretty sloppy. Let me watch it again, just to make sure I've got it all right...

...Yeah. Piss poor. So to review: Guy loves cats. Has a fucked-up tie. Runs around city on roof-tops. Did the producers and Frank honestly look at this teaser and say "YEAH! This whole constant-red tie gimmick will definitely get EVERYONE creaming their jeans!"

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