Tuesday, April 01, 2008

LADY ELAINE FAIRCHILDE


Lady Elaine Fairchilde is an abomination. Mr. Rogers' cross-dressing alcoholic junky with cysts on her cheeks is one of the most hideous things ever created by man. I honestly believe if you look you'd find on-line support groups for kids and adults who suffer anxiety and nightmares from this vile red-blotched plague-ridden abhorrence of revulsion. As a child, I was honestly disgusted by this puppet. DISGUSTED.

The creator of the Lady Elaine Fairchilde puppet, Dennis Char, now makes Surrey, BC his home and when I heard which park he frequents, I met up with the man asked him a few questions:

Halfsquatch: Hi and you are?

Dennis Char: Yup, I'm Dennis.

HS: You used to make puppets? Tell me about that.

DC: Yup. I used to work for various stage groups as a set builder and carpenter. I made puppets as a hobby. One day, I got a job to work on the Land of Imagination set for Mr. Rogers. While building the King Friday's castle I noticed that there were puppets being brought in and I got excited because I love puppets. So the next day I brought in 3 or 4 puppets to show Fred [Mr. Rogers]. He was a very nice man and thought that he could use Jonesy for one of the characters.

Dennis Char. Ex-puppet builder. Ex-convict. Murderer.

HS: Jonesy is who Lady Elaine became right?

DC: Yup. So Fred took Jonesy around to various crew members and producers and asked if they thought Jonesy could be the Lady Elaine Fairchilde character and I guess they thought that he could 'cause after a bit Fred came over and asked if it would be okay to buy Jonesy from me which was great. My first professional sale I guess. Oh and I told them that Jonesy was a boy. They added the red blush stuff to his cheeks to make him look more like a girl. Jonesy didn't have that crap on his face. They kinda made him ugly. At least I think he's ugly. Uglier than before anyways.

HS: How much did they buy him for?

DC: I think they gave me around 50 dollars.

HS: Sweet!

DC: Back then 50 dollars was like 100 so yeah, it was!

HS: What happened to your puppet career after that? Did you do anything else?

DC: Nope. I caught my wife with another man and I shot them both with a shotgun while they were taking a shower. I served my time in the shoe and now here I am. Can't say I've made all the right moves, you know?

HS: The night you killed your wife and her lover--not a good move?

DC: Well the hell do you think? Jesus Christ! It was a really bad move on my part!

HS: Are you okay now? How are things?

DC: Jesus Christ.

And with that Dennis got up from the bench and made his way out of the park.

Dennis Char makes one of his puppets years
before the murdering of his wife and her lover.

10 comments:

octoberinaugust said...

is this fabricated? Cause this is scary.

Anonymous said...

I work with a woman (if you can call her that) who looks like Lady Elaine if you added about 300 lbs and lobbed off half her nose. She's about 5' tall. Gross! She's as sweet as she is pretty too! ACK!

Anonymous said...

I really like what you guys tend to be up too. This type of clever work and exposure!
Keep up the terrific works guys I've included you guys to blogroll.

Also visit my blog ... maxleticssports.com

Anonymous said...

What's up it's me, I am also visiting this web site daily,
this web page is in fact good and the users are in fact
sharing nice thoughts.

Also visit my site ... Cheap Louis Vuitton Bags

Anonymous said...

Amazing! Its actually remarkable article, I have got much clear
idea concerning from this post.

Have a look at my web page susanmallgrave.com

Anonymous said...

Howdy I am so grateful I found your weblog, I really found you by
mistake, while I was browsing on Bing for something else, Anyways
I am here now and would just like to say kudos for a fantastic post and a all round interesting blog (I also love the theme/design),
I don’t have time to read it all at the moment but I have bookmarked it and also added your RSS feeds, so when I have time
I will be back to read a lot more, Please do keep up the fantastic jo.


Also visit my web-site - get more info

Anonymous said...

Link exchange is nothing else but it is just placing the other person's weblog link on your page at appropriate place and other person will also do similar in favor of you.

Also visit my weblog: Boutique Air Max

Anonymous said...

Hi, this weekend is good for me, since this moment i am
reading this impressive informative piece of writing here at my home.


Also visit my web blog; Louis Vuitton Purses

Anonymous said...

Lady Elaine is awesome and this stupid story blows.
Thanks.

Heather Knowles said...

With all due respect to this very entertaining rendition, it is, as far as my research has confirmed, 100% not true... But, she scared us all and so this one is frighteningly believable to many who don't know the real story.
She was actually based on Mr. Roger's Aunt Elaine Crozier.
Her name: Elaine, means a feeling of unrequited, or reciprocated love.
Fairchild: well, she once was a fair child, she didn't always look or act the way we see her in the show. She was once young and beautiful. Her hideousness happened, as in Arthurian Legend, to Lady Elaine, after being rejected by her true love... She never fully recovered :'(

While weeping to Lady Aberlin in an episode she said, "They hate me! They think I'm ugly and scary!"
To which Lady Aberlin replied, "that's because they don't know you Lady Elaine!". She locked herself up in her museum and grew uglier and uglier. But she was never beyond hope and redemption.
The internet is full of horrible comments about her, but I think any of us who grew up with Mr. Rogers should agree...Lady Elain, we "like you just the way you are!"